


Merry Christmas, Ya Filthy Animals

by Star_Going_Supernova



Series: human titans 'verse [6]
Category: Godzilla: King of The Monsters (2019)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Presents, Fluff, Found Family, Gen, Human!Godzilla, Human!Mothra, Humor, Snowball Fight, Ugly Holiday Sweaters, i'm not naming all of them, seriously there isn't a speck of real angst in this, sometimes a family is a dad; his daughter; and six Titans in human form
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:02:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28323546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Star_Going_Supernova/pseuds/Star_Going_Supernova
Summary: “Okay,” Maddie said, clapping her hands together as they entered the department store. “Christmas sweaters!”She very deliberately didn’t sayuglyChristmas sweaters, even though that was what they were shopping for, because while Kevin certainly didn’t mind wearing silly things, Ni and Ichi would refuse to touch them if they knew the truth.(a selection of glimpses into how the Russells and their ever-growing gang of Titan friends celebrate Christmas)
Relationships: Godzilla (Legendary | MonsterVerse) & Madison Russell, King Ghidorah & Madison Russell, Madison Russell & Mark Russell, Mothra & Madison Russell, Rodan (Kaiju) & Madison Russell, Titans & Titans
Series: human titans 'verse [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1565005
Comments: 34
Kudos: 59





	Merry Christmas, Ya Filthy Animals

**Author's Note:**

> There are a dozen other things I could’ve had them do, but if this went any longer, I’d have to make it more than one chapter! Merry Christmas to those who celebrate, and happy holidays if you don’t! 
> 
> (title from _Home Alone_. do... do you get it? :> animals, titans...)
> 
> Hope y'all enjoy!

“Okay,” Maddie said, clapping her hands together as they entered the department store. “Christmas sweaters!”

She very deliberately didn’t say _ugly_ Christmas sweaters, even though that was what they were shopping for, because while Kevin certainly didn’t mind wearing silly things, Ni and Ichi would refuse to touch them if they knew the truth. And even though neither of them were with her, Mothra, and Kevin at the mall, Kevin couldn’t keep a secret from his brothers to save his life.

Mothra, on the other hand, knew _exactly_ what she wasn’t saying, probably knew exactly why, and would most definitely help her accomplish her goal: get the ‘triplets’ into the most ridiculous ugly Christmas sweaters she could possibly find.

“I want one with the mutated, bullied animal!” Kevin said, entirely too enthusiastically for how that sentence sounded.

“Rudolph,” Mothra gently reminded him. “His name is Rudolph.”

“We can absolutely get you one with Rudolph,” Maddie assured him. “I bet there’s one where his nose sticks out and glows, too.”

Compared to his brothers, Kevin had taken to the human experience rather well, once Godzilla got the whole three-minds-in-one-body-with-only-one-head thing sorted out. Even Maddie had felt bad about how… in-shock they’d all become afterwards, when each had their own head _and_ their own body.

Kevin had readily admitted that the silence and complete control was unnerving, but not as bad as their previous situation. They’d all been attached at the hip for the first week and a half, and then Ichi realized he could access the apartment building’s roof, and it’d all been downhill from there. How he’d gotten the water balloons, much less managed to fill them all, she’d never found out.

It was pretty funny, in Maddie’s opinion, how Kevin turned out to be more extroverted than the other two. He _liked_ going places where lots of people were, and he and Mothra—provided they were both human at the same time, which was more often than not these days—enjoyed sitting outside in different places to quietly people-watch, while steadily making their way through a local cafe’s extensive list of coffee and tea flavors.

It was kind of adorable, especially since it didn’t involve property damage like the wrestling that Godzilla and the other two occasionally got up to. With the reversal of height advantage, Maddie couldn’t really blame Godzilla for taking advantage while he could.

Overall, it wasn’t so bad having more than doubled her usual exposure to human Titans. Monarch had quietly bought a few other apartments in the Russell’s building for their use, so her dad’s blood pressure would stop spiking every time he woke up to find a Titan or three sprawled in his living room.

“There they are,” Mothra said, directing them down an aisle toward the clearly marked holiday gear. “How many do we need?”

“Dad’s already got one—he says the holes are part of its charm—but I outgrew mine, so I need one. Whatever Kevin wants, and two more for Ni and Ichi, and—do you think we’ll find one big enough for Godzilla?”

Mothra hummed contemplatively, leisurely flicking through the garish designs. Kevin gleefully held up two different sweaters with Rudolph on them.

After nearly an hour of searching, trying things on, and debating, they made their purchases and returned to the parking lot. Kevin ended up getting two different Rudolph-based sweaters, one that was actually pretty nice and one that had an actual stuffed reindeer sticking out of the front, which was printed to look like a broken barn wall. Predictably, the butt stuck out of the back. If you squeezed the red nose, it honked.

Maddie settled on an obnoxiously bright green sweater covered in white blocky writing proclaiming “Fa La La La Llama” on repeat. And on the front, in textured fabric, was a large white llama wearing a scarf and an overlarge pair of red sunglasses.

The one they picked for Ni was candy-cane patterned and covered in rows upon rows of tiny bells. Like, a crazy amount of bells. And since they doubted he’d tolerate it for long, they bought a backup sweater decorated with multicolored snowflakes and wrapped top to bottom in a thick line of silver tinsel. Ichi’s, a dark shade of green, had a small strand of actual fairy lights stitched all around it, with pompoms hanging off the sleeves like ornaments. His came with a headband bearing a glittery gold star on a wire spring, which would make it bounce around whenever he moved.

Rodan’s bore a typical holiday pattern with snowflakes and poinsettias, except the centerpiece was a Santa-hat-wearing T-rex holding a dead reindeer in its mouth. Maddie was sure he’d get a kick out of it.

And they had ended up finding a sweater for Godzilla, too. It was a simple blue with a snow along the bottom, the front taken up by a large picture of a reindeer’s body. The neck ended at the head hole, so the wearer’s head would take the place of the reindeer’s. Sticking out of the back was a fluffy fabric tail. His also came with a headband, only with antlers attached.

Arguably, Mothra had the most boring one, but since she was the one who’d be wearing it, it was pretty funny. It read “On the Naughty List For:” across the chest, and there was a space below it that was meant to look like a lined piece of paper with space to write your bad deeds. It even came with a fabric marker. She couldn’t wait to see what Mothra put on there.

They loaded the bags in the back of the car before shaking the snow off their boots and climbing in. Monarch had obtained them a nice vacation home in Montana so they could experience snow for the holidays. This was either the best or worst idea ever, since the large backyard currently boasted snow forts and defensive walls, and not an evening had gone by without a ferocious snowball fight.

For the most part, it was the triplets against Godzilla, Mothra, and Rodan, since her dad had banned Maddie from joining after she took a snowball packed with ice to the forehead. The cut still hadn’t gone away.

Mothra drove them back to the house, since she was the only one of the Titans that Monarch would even _consider_ giving a license to. It barely took any convincing at all on Maddie’s part to get them to sing along with the radio at the top of their lungs. _You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch_ was enthusiastically belted out, followed by _Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer._

All those days of having the radio playing the Christmas station were finally coming in handy.

• • • 

The sweaters were mandatory for both Christmas Eve and Christmas day, or you wouldn’t be allowed in the house. Despite the penalty, Ni appeared to seriously consider throwing his in the fireplace.

“Group picture,” Maddie, trying not to choke on her laughter, insisted once everyone had theirs on. “We need a group picture right now.”

They actually managed to do one or two nice ones, where everyone was either smiling or grimace-smiling. The phone, set to take a photo every five seconds after the initial timer, got some _really_ good ones afterwards of their obligatory silly faces, which devolved into mushing each other’s cheeks around, and only ended when Godzilla straight up lifted a screeching and flailing Kevin horizontally above his head.

The entire set was emailed to roughly a dozen Monarch friends for safekeeping. Her dad got a text a few minutes later from Ling, who informed them that Rick had taken one look at the selection and inhaled his coffee so hard, they were considering taking him to the infirmary.

• • •

Due to her ban on being involved in the snowball fights, Maddie bundled up and sat in the snow throne Rodan and Mothra had made for her to referee the battle and keep track of each team’s “deaths.”

Godzilla wracked up the most, because he had a problem with staying crouched down. Maddie had to yell at him several times to stay on his side of the field.

“It’s long range only!” she called, pointing back at his team’s fort. “No fistfights!”

Ichi placed a close second, if only because he couldn’t resist being taunted and kept working up enough of a rage that he’d get careless and lean over their barricades to shout insults back.

The one time Kevin peeked up over the wall he was hiding behind, Mothra nailed him with a giant snowball, right in the face. He’d elected himself as the snowball maker for his brothers after that.

Rodan had to play with oven mitts on because he ran so warm, the snow more or less melted right out of his hands. Amazingly, that didn’t turn out to be a disadvantage for him. Probably thanks to him having the largest surface area for hands to work with.

It was so funny to watch these ancient, powerful creatures pummel each other with snowballs that Maddie didn’t even notice her butt go numb. Even holding still wasn’t enough to make her cold, thanks to the near-constant laughter shaking her body.

The only thing better was when they went inside afterward, all of the Titans at least a little soaked, and found her dad had built a roaring fire in the living room fireplace. And even Ni and Ichi participated in the relaxed puppy pile on a mound of blankets in front of it.

Maddie fell asleep at some point, warm and comfy, squished between Godzilla and Rodan, who had been unceremoniously pulled into the middle as a living space heater. But that was okay, because she wasn’t the only one who ended up taking a nap.

• • •

Times of gift-giving were difficult for the Russells. Dads in general were impossible to buy for anyway, and Maddie just didn’t want much. She knew it frustrated her dad sometimes, because he wanted to be able to give her things for Christmas or her birthday, and she was of no help.

It’d been years since she’d asked for toys of any sort, and celebrations had sometimes been difficult to have when she and Mom had been traveling between bases, many of which were somewhat isolated.

Really, all Maddie truly wanted was time spent with her dad, and more recently, the Titans. She knew how easy it was to lose someone, how the regret for all the time you didn’t spend together weighed on a person.

Her dad couldn’t complain too much, either, because he was practically the same. And the Titans weren’t particularly materialistic, understandably.

Basically, there wasn’t much under the chaotically decorated tree in the living room of their vacation house. One wrapped box contained a new laptop for her, which she knew because she’d been the one to pick it out. Another was from her and her dad for Mothra, and was a lovely little tea set. Ilene Chen had recommended an old friend who had been painting pots and cups for years to do the designs.

Delicate little moths and butterflies decorated the pristine white surfaces, and even Dad had admitted it was beautifully done.

There was a box for Rodan, because Maddie had been physically incapable of passing up the matte black pocket lighter with a hilariously disproportionate image of Rodan’s Titan form etched on one side. The other side could be customized with a name, and she’d rather gleefully had them put Radon on it. A wonky name for a wonky depiction.

A couple envelopes littered the tree skirt, along with a few other presents. They’d been busy enough since their arrival that she hadn’t investigated who they were for or who they were from. Either way, Christmas morning would probably prove to be hilarious.

• • •

After consuming their amazingly fancy Christmas Eve dinner of massive amounts of fried chicken takeout, her dad, who clearly wanted to watch the world burn, pulled out Monopoly.

Where he’d gotten it, she didn’t know.

The Battle of Montana began, and there’d be no taking of prisoners.

“You couldn’t have chosen Yahtzee or something?” she hissed at her dad, the self-elected banker, while Ni debated whether to buy more hotels.

“I deserve this,” he whispered back, watching Rodan go in for a strangulation attempt. While everyone else was distracted, he slipped Maddie a couple bills, as he had been from the beginning. They’d placed bets on how long it would take someone who wasn’t Mothra to notice that Maddie _really_ should’ve gone bankrupt a while ago.

“You know what other game I brought?” Dad asked a few minutes later, when her turn had come and gone. Godzilla was gearing up to arm wrestle Mothra for a property, which was very stupid of him.

“I’m not sure I want to know.”

Maddie knew what evil looked like a person’s eyes, and that was what she was seeing in her dad’s as he said, “Jenga.”

No one noticed her thunking her head against the table in despair, because she accidentally timed it just right so her forehead connected at the same time as Mothra won their arm wrestle, smashing Godzilla’s hand down with such force that his wrist audibly dislocated.

• • •

Jenga lasted for as long as it took for Rodan to try and trip up Ichi as he took his turn, and the tower fell with a loud clatter as bodies went lunging over the table and a wrestling match ensued.

Kevin kept trying to rebuild the tower, while Godzilla and Ni started out as cheering on the wrestlers, only for Godzilla to get caught up in the excitement and body slam him to the floor.

Mothra sighed at the four of them, muttered, “Nothing new,” just loud enough for Maddie to overhear, and stood. Pulling Kevin away from the blocks, she herded the three of them into the kitchen and whispered conspiratorially, “We may as well have dessert without them.”

A loud crack, followed by either Ni or Ichi’s wail, came from the living room. Kevin gasped, one hand lifting to gently cover his nose. “I remember that sound,” he said with a glance at Maddie.

“If they get blood on the carpet, they’re the ones cleaning it up,” her dad promised darkly.

Tell-tale jingling from someone knocking against the tree had him frowning, but ultimately, the lure of the ice cream cake Mothra had pulled from the freezer seemed to keep him from going to check on the rambunctious Titans.

Something shattered as they set out plates and forks, but Dad only sighed and mumbled, “I need a drink.”

Maddie snickered as he dug out the bottle of wine that was supposed to be for later, and pulled out two glasses. The second was offered to Mothra, who accepted it and raised the glass in grateful salute.

• • •

As chaotically fun as the day had been, Maddie was glad when they finally all sat down to finish the night with a couple Christmas movies. And thank goodness for the extra couches, since she doubted the original one and an armchair could’ve comfortably seated six adult-sized human Titans, one normal human adult, and herself.

No matter how soft the carpet was, or how warm the fire made it, no way would she have sat on the floor.

Since the Titans didn’t know any Christmas movies, and her dad would only pick the old stop-motion classics with Rudolph and Santa Claus—not that there was anything wrong with those—Maddie was left to make the decision. And since she doubted _some_ members of the audience wouldn’t be able to sit still through more than two, it was a very important decision.

Naturally, she chose _The Polar Express_ first and foremost, because she desperately needed to see them react to the uncanny valley of the characters’ faces. She’d tried to explain the concept to Mothra a while back, but without examples, it just hadn’t clicked. And the hot chocolate song was just too good to pass up. Kevin would probably love that.

The second movie she picked was a given, since it’d been tradition for her family to watch it on Christmas Eve every year for as long as she could remember. Even when it was just her and Mom, they’d kept this night free. There was no way this would be the year they didn’t watch _A Charlie Brown Christmas_.

Altogether, it’d be just over two hours. Not long enough for anyone to start getting fidgety.

She had _The Polar Express_ ready to play by the time popcorn and hot chocolate had been passed out and everyone was cozy and relaxed under various blankets. Another minute was spent convincing Kevin to take off his reindeer headband, because the bells were only funny when there wasn’t a movie to focus on. Ni, who’d actually gone the whole day without taking it off, was only too happy to ditch his own jingly nightmare of a sweater.

The lamps were shut off, leaving only the TV, Christmas tree, and crackling fireplace to supply the room with light. Her dad was happily reclined in the large armchair, looking more than ready to let himself drift off before the Polar Express even had showed itself. Admittedly, he deserved it, given he’d put up with so many Titans in their vacation house without complaint.

Between the triplets and Rodan, the two spare couches were occupied, though she could still spot a bit of mostly-friendly nudging. Rodan lived up to his heat-loving, ‘Fire Demon,’ Titan form, and had somehow managed to swaddle himself in too many blankets to count, and if one squinted, the mound might even have looked like a volcano.

Maddie herself was comfortably sandwiched—but not too tightly—between Godzilla and Mothra, with one large blanket spread over their laps. She took a sip of her hot cocoa, glanced around one last time to make sure everyone was ready, and pressed play.

As the opening credits ran, she snuggled back into the couch, warm, happy, and relaxed. _Wish you were here, Andrew,_ she thought, as she usually did on holidays and anniversaries. In the privacy of her own room, long after they’d all said goodnight, she’d watch the first two movies in the _Home Alone_ series.

There were two reasons she hadn’t chosen either for family movie night. One, she absolutely, 100%, _did not need_ any of the Titans to get any ideas. She didn’t think her dad would emotionally survive a prank war between them.

Two… she didn’t know if it’d been a tradition. Maddie just couldn’t remember far back enough, not anymore, but she _did_ remember her and Andrew’s last Christmas together, huddled under the covers in his room, watching both movies on his tablet. It was a nothing short of a Christmas miracle that their giggling hadn’t been heard.

Those, on Christmas Eve, belonged to her and her brother.

• • •

Since her dad had suffered enough when she was younger, Maddie made a point to burst into the other guest rooms, dash in and leap onto the bed, jump around just enough to give the occupant a heart attack, and dash back out.

Mothra had beaten her to waking up, and was already in the kitchen with Dad, but _boy,_ did the others shriek. Rodan had quite the scream on him, and Ichi had been close enough to the edge of his bed that he’d tumbled to the floor when she bounced onto the mattress.

Godzilla’s reaction was probably her favorite, though, because he snorted awake, nearly cross-eyed, and promptly tangled himself in his sheets trying to grab her before she could escape. Laughing giddily, she’d narrowly evaded him and skidded out into the hallway.

By the time they trickled into the kitchen, Maddie was innocently sitting beside Mothra, eating the egg bake Dad had prepared last night. The sight of food soothed most of their disgruntlement, though Godzilla ruffled her hair so badly, it got all staticky.

No one was in a particular rush, so they made idle chatter while sitting around the table, watching big snowflakes float slowly to the ground through the windows.

“We should go skiing,” Maddie said. The mental image of the triplets inevitably wiping out was too good to pass up. She _had_ to see it in real life.

Her dad’s eyes lit up like he was having a similar vision. “We could probably make that happen.”

“What’s skiing?” Kevin asked.

Godzilla snickered. “Oh, this’ll be good.”

Rodan sipped his nearly boiling coffee. “Will I be stared at if I go in a t-shirt and shorts?”

“Yes. But go big or go home. Don’t wear a shirt at all,” Maddie dared him.

He raised his mug to her. “Done.”

Mothra shook her head, chuckling. “I’d like to try snowboarding,” she admitted.

“Hell yeah,” Maddie said. “I’ve done both, and you definitely have the coordination and balance.”

“Why are you discussing torture techniques?” Ni asked, making Dad choke on his egg bake. He looked around at the rest of them. “Is snowboarding not like waterboarding?”

“Not even a little,” her dad said. “It’s a sport, not an interrogation method.”

An expression of mild disappointment crossed his face. “Ah.”

“What’s skiing?” Kevin asked again, a little louder.

• • • 

They gathered in the living room once everyone was done eating, scattering across the couches and floor. It seemed even Titans weren’t immune to the childlike urge to sit cross-legged on the carpet, ready to open presents.

Rodan loved his lighter. He tipped over from laughing too hard at the etching, clutching his stomach in a blatantly human gesture.

Mothra beamed over the tea set, thanking them both heartily and adding, “I can’t believe you remembered.”

Maddie shrugged, smiling. “It seemed like something you really wanted whenever you talked about it. Of course we remembered.”

She thanked Dad once again for the laptop when she opened it. Having been prepared, she already had a fresh backup from her old computer ready to restore all her settings and stuff. Knowing how long it could take, Maddie grabbed her stuff to get it started on the dining table while Rodan and the triplets each opened an envelope.

“If you handle the gift cards okay,” her dad said as they examined the different plastic cards they’d been given, “then Monarch will _consider_ giving you access to money, like Mothra and Godzilla have.”

Godzilla leaned over to Rodan and whispered, “That’s a card to to the account they gave us. You’re not on probation like them, but don’t tell them that.”

Winking unsubtly, Rodan returned the card to the envelope and tucked it beneath his leg. Maddie rolled her eyes. He was just lucky the triplets were pretty clueless sometimes.

When she returned to her seat on the floor, there was a small envelope waiting for her.

It only had a single slip of ordinary paper in it, with writing that she recognized as her dad’s. She read it, then again to double-check that her eyes weren’t playing tricks on her. Gasping, she whipped around to face her dad, who was sitting at the table. “Are you serious?” she asked, waving the slip of paper around.

Looking a bit like he’d smelled something rank, he nodded. “But only after you’re sixteen, which I realize is a long way away, but I’m hoping you’ll use the year to be really sure about what you want.”

“What is it?” Mothra asked.

A thrilled, incredulous smile slowly formed on her face. “It’s permission for me to get a tattoo when I turn sixteen. Since I’m a minor, I need a parent to sign for consent. It also says he’ll pay for some temporary ones.”

“Temporary tattoos fade after a week or two,” Dad explained. “You can test out designs and placement with them before committing to the real thing.”

“I’ve been talking about wanting one for a while,” Maddie added, grinning down at the paper. “But I figured I’d just have to wait until I was an adult.” Popping to her feet, she went and hugged her dad. “Thank you!”

“Sixteenth birthday,” he reminded her. “I won’t cave and let you get it sooner.”

“I can be patient. And like you said, I have plenty of time to decide what I want.”

A while later, when everyone started to disperse to put their things away, Maddie sidled up to Godzilla before he could leave. “Sorry I didn’t get you anything,” she said, fiddling with the hem of her ugly Christmas sweater. “I just couldn’t think of something you wanted. You’re as hard to buy for as my dad.”

He snorted and tugged her against his side. “And does your dad mind not getting something from you?”

“…No.”

Godzilla made a _see?_ gesture. “Besides, I remember you talking about this before, how spending time with your family means more to you than some trinket. Me? I think I’m the same. This vacation has been all I needed, Pup. I couldn’t have asked for or gotten anything better.”

“I’m glad, G. And me too.” She paused. “Although, I did make the argument that we should get you a Nerf gun, but then we figured we’d have to get everyone a Nerf gun, and Dad vetoed a vacation with six armed Titans, so, yeah.” Peeking to make sure her dad wasn’t nearby, she whispered conspiratorially, “But—I think we should definitely go pick some out when we get home.”

He laughed, the whole-body sort of laughter that had him screwing his eyes up and throwing his head back. Maddie didn’t know anyone else who so wholeheartedly threw themselves into their laughter like he did. “That,” he said, grinning with his fangs on display, “sounds like an excellent idea. The others won’t know what hit ’em.”

It wasn’t the sort of Christmas she ever could’ve imagined as a kid, but that didn’t mean it was any less wonderful. They’d come a long way, not just she and her dad, but all of them. The weirdness between Dad and Godzilla had faded sufficiently, enough for them to have normal conversations. The triplets weren’t _that_ bad most of the time, and Maddie could truthfully say she mostly enjoyed their company these days. And for as new to the group as Rodan was, he balanced it all near-perfectly.

And with how completely and utterly different from the norm it was, Maddie couldn’t wait to see what they’d manage to cook up next year.

**Author's Note:**

> And Godzilla and Maddie absolutely destroyed the triplets with their Nerf guns. Obviously, it meant _war_.
> 
> I hope y’all are enjoying your day whether you’re celebrating Christmas or not! I love you lots! ❤️❤️❤️
> 
> • [my tumblr](https://star-going-supernova.tumblr.com) •


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